Jackie's review for Amber and Rhiannon's short stories

Jaclyn Quattrochi
Kizzier 209
Reviews
Jackie’s review on Rhiannon’s poem Mama
Rhiannon’s short story Mama is about a woman who has cancer in the hospital on Christmas Eve. Throughout the short story Olivia, the woman dying from cancer slips into morphine dreams about her and her mother while she was a child. Eventually Olivia passes away to finally be with her mother. I really liked how the line “mama doesn’t like…” was repeated throughout the story. It gives the reader a sense of who Olivia’s mother is as a character. I also liked how Olivia’s passing represented Olivia being pulled out of the cold winter to be with her mother since her mother didn’t like Olivia being out in the cold. I think that Rhiannon could have given more detail about where her mother was originally from or more about Olivia’s daughter. Over all I thought it was a well thought and constructed short story.
Jackie’s review on Ambers Poem
Amber’s poem is about a woman visiting her father’s grave while reminiscing about the traditions her and her father had together. I liked the idea for the story, the idea of a woman visiting her father’s grave on his birthday is a very hard thing to do and is a very powerful scene. I also like dhow Amber describes the girls mom with her and how impatient the mother was waiting and the sense that the mother did not feel the same way about the father as the girl did. I do think Amber should finish writing the story by adding the ride home in with the mother. I do think the conversation on the way home would be a very interesting end to the story. I really enjoyed this short story and felt it was something I could connect with.